Awakening, the dawn yet hours away. Eyes closed, yet wide open as I search for You. Ears alert to the sound of Your feet shuffling toward the veil. Will You draw it back today? Will I feel the warmth of Your Presence as You enter my world?
Only the slight sound of Wind against the windows. Otherwise, silent.
Wait. Patience. Endure. These are the creatures that inhabit the Cosmos! I see them with my eyes and hear them with my ears Every moment. Every day.
When, my Friend? Shall we walk together and speak of things long gone? Perhaps, those yet to come. Yes. That would be appropriate. Where shall we go from here?
Here we are, folks! The holiday season is upon us. Turkeys will be roasting. Families and friends will gather for Feasting, Fun, and Fellowship. Soon, the holiday lights and Christmas trees will appear in lawns and windows. Cookies will be baked. (Some might even last long enough to be decorated!) Carols and hymns will be sung. Gifts will be exchanged.
Yippee!
Did I ever happen to tell you that I really, really hate this time of the year? And, no, Hate is not too strong of a word. I, and many, many others like me struggle every year at this time. Anxiety keeps me awake at night. I have to watch that anger doesn’t leak out and splash on everyone. My wife asked what I hoped to see happen this holiday season. I told her that I would really like to go to sleep on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving and wake up on January 2. Of course, that was blown off with a “Bah humbug” response.
But, for a lot of us, this season isn’t something that can be easily blown off with light platitudes. The anxiety is real. Many of us also struggle with S.A.D. every year. That just adds to the mess that our hearts and minds become.
We do try to put on our holiday game face. “Joy to the World” and all of that. My desire to hibernate through the season hasn’t worked yet. So, I must play the part as best as I can. Keep the peace and all of that.
I’m sure that I’ll get through this year, just like I have every other year. January will come eventually and I can get my life back a little.
But, when you see me, or anyone else like me who struggles with this season, please don’t tell us to just get over it. Don’t mumble something like “Bah humbug” that only adds shame to our already full plate.
Give us space. We’ll get through this with or without your help. We always do.
In fact, we don’t want your advice. We’ve heard it. At least, I know that I’m taking steps to work through this time. So, thanks, but no thanks to the ‘helpful hints.’
