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Category: Life and culture

2018 – A Reflection

Well, it’s that time again. You know, when everyone who has access to the internet shares their views on the year that is now closing. There will be pundits who go over every little bit of political detritus so that they can show everyone how politically astute they are. There will be others who will share with us all of the tech milestones that we have passed. The latest smartphone or Alexa type device will be hailed as the greatest development since the automatic bread slicer. Others will write about entertainment or sports happenings. They will want us to know who the movers and shakers of the industry were. And, they’ll tell us about all of the folks who began 2018 but didn’t survive to ring it out.

I’m not going to do any of that. No, I’m going to keep it personal. Not that my life this past year has been in any way newsworthy. It hasn’t. I am pretty sure, though, that any one who reads this, (maybe both of you!), will be able to relate. After all, none of us are entertainment or sports stars. We don’t hang out in the halls of government. Nor do we own the World Wide Web. I think that we’re all pretty much the same. Just regular folks trying to get by.

So, what happened…

Well, one thing that I don’t think that you can relate to is that as of yesterday I have been sober for one year. “What?” you ask. “You had a drinking problem?” Well, it depends on how you look at it. From where I was in 2017 I could say, “Problem? I drink, I get drunk, I fall asleep. See? No problem.” The truth, though, is that I do have a problem. So, going all through 2018 without imbibing is a pretty big deal.

Perhaps as a result of the first thing, I spent more time on personal fitness. After all, I’m getting to be an old fart. I already had one heart attack. I seriously don’t want a repeat of that. In fact, during June and July I averaged nearly 100 miles walking. I completed the equivalent of a half marathon twice. I slowed down a bit during August and September because of weather. Plus, I had other activities that helped keep me fit. I hope to continue working at this in 2019.

I spent more time writing in 2018 than in previous years. Some of you are aware that I completed NaNoWriMo in November. 50,000+ words in just under 30 days. I also completed that novel by the second week of December. And, I just started a second a couple days ago. Although, I’m under no time constraints with this one. Maybe, by spring I’ll have a first draft. I also decided to pick up the pace here a bit. Whether anyone reads these posts or not, I have continued to write and share. Hopefully, that’ll continue into the new year.

One of the more obscure things that I did was to confirm with a financial advisor that I will, in fact, be able to retire before I reach 70. That was welcome news. Although,that won’t become a reality until 2020, it is something to look forward to. I will never truly retire and become a snow bird traveling between the North and Florida. But, I will no longer be working for someone else.

The biggest accomplishment, though, is the fact that I made it through another year alive and fairly well. It has required an effort to accomplish this. The stuff I wrote above played a large part in making it. I am grateful to those who have had my back during this year, and previous ones. And, I’m learning how to let gratitude continue to grow.

Yeah, 2018 had some rough moments. But, overall I think that it lived well. Soon, that old guy, Father Time, will swing his sickle and all of those past moments will be reaped and stored into the barns of Eternity. From there we can access them, process the grain, and the memories can then sustain us as week walk into the unknown of 2019.

Blessings to you!

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Into the Hands of a Hateful Church

Yesterday I wrote a piece about how Evangelicals embrace something called Penal Substitution. They believe that this is foundational for the Real True Gospel, (RTG). I also said that along the way people who really don’t care about religion or theology would be able to take from it. After all,who really does care what a bunch of religious folks think? As long as it doesn’t affect me, let them believe whatever nonsense they want.

Ok, fair enough.

In 2016 a person was elected president of the U.S.This person is at best unqualified for the office. At worst, he’s a danger to the Republic. How did this happen? Social scientists, anthropologists, news pundits…everyone has a theory. And, they all make sense.

One thing, though, that sometimes gets overlooked is that 81% of White Evangelical Christians voted for this person.

Eighty-one Percent!!!

And, some recent polls indicate that support has remained at or near that level throughout the last two years.

How is that possible? Seriously. How can an entire demographic that has historically touted its moral superiority over the immorality of “the world” support a known liar, adulterer, womanizer, misogynist, thrice married, ignorant buffoon? It boggles the mind.

Unless…unless you understand the Evangelical mindset.

The simple answer is a single issue.

Abortion.

In the late 1970s and early 1980s, the Evangelical position swung from being OK with abortion to one of vicious opposition. That one issue became the rallying cry for all who followed the likes of Pat Robertson and,especially, Jerry Falwell, Sr. So loud was the cry that the Christian Right made it the litmus test for any political candidate. If a candidate’s platform included the words, “anti-abortion,” then they were a good choice.

The Republican Party sensed that and made abortion a part of the party platform. Now, when Evangelicals went to the polls their decision was made easy. Vote Republican! Easy-peasy!

So, when the current president embraced the Republican platform, including the anti-abortion plank, Evangelicals saw their savior.

Ok, that’s the simple answer.

But, it’s not the only or even best answer.

To find that we need to look deeper into the heart of Evangelicalism.

Yesterday I wrote that many in the Evangelical camp sincerely believe that God is so Just that it’s impossible for God to be in the same room as sin. (Whatever that is.) In fact, God hates sin, and by extension, those who practice sin. Hate, hate, hate! Over time this has been hardwired into the hearts of the faithful.

God Hates!

This has enabled those who embrace this picture of God to also hate. They, by Divine example, now have a binary that they can follow. They can know in their knowers that they are righteous and oh so good with confidence. There is a line. On one side the righteous followers of God; on the other is Everyone Else. There is no gray.Everything is black and white. They can even go to their Holy Book and find all sorts of texts to prove just how righteous they are and how worthy of their hate everyone else is.

This is where the danger lies for us and for the world. By dividing everything and everyone into Us and Them they can in all good faith destroy what they don’t like or agree with and tell themselves, “Well, it’s what God wants us to do.”

Are you reading this starting to see the picture form?

Evangelicals in the U.S.have and agenda. And, it’s not simply a religious agenda. It is entirely political. Falwell and friends decided that there could be a political solution to a very Spiritual issue. Their Evangelical followers then sold their collective soul to the devil in order to see their twisted and misguided theology become a physical reality.

The U.S.,to them, was a Christian nation that they could reclaim and, through political means, force their idea of God and righteousness on everyone. (This is the main reason that I think that Mike Pence is more dangerous than our current president.)

Now, I admit that this is an oversimplification of a very complex issue. Evangelicals are not monolithic. There are sincerely faithful people who hold to the tenets of historical Evangelicalism. I know many personally. They are good people who really want to follow Jesus faithfully.

But, the truth of the matter seems to be that the root of Evangelicalism that has been passed along from the First Great Awakening until now is rotten. It has grown into a macabre caricature of the Church that started as a result of Jesus Christ’s life.

It is dangerous.

It is foul.

It must be resisted at every front vigorously.

Hopefully, this is something that you can take home with you.

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Whatever Happened to ‘Frankie’?

Back in the early 1980’s I and my family began attending a small, independent evangelical church. One of those churches that seemed to spring up everywhere in those days. I had been part of the Jesus Movement of the early 70’s and had somehow navigated my way to this church. It was a good time to be a conservative believer.

During some of the church new members’ classes I was introduced to a man named Francis Schaeffer. Apparently, Schaeffer was a hero among conservative evangelicals. And, I happened to be in a class that was taught by an ardent disciple of his.

I learned that Schaeffer was something of Christian intellectual. You know, the kind of person who could rationally explain Christian doctrines. Someone who could lucidly explain ‘why we believe what we believe.’

However, at that time I was involved with the music ministry of the church. Playing guitar was more important than reading the work of some guy with long hair and a funky goatee who apparently never smiled.

Shortly before I left that church for the last time, my wife and I were invited to the home of that person who followed Schaeffer to share a meal. During the meal Schaeffer’s name came up. The pastor spoke wistfully about how Francis was a great man and defender of the faith. He then wondered whatever happened to Schaeffer’s son, Frank. He mentioned how ‘Frankie’ had once been a strong Christian like his father, but had somehow fallen away.

Truthfully, at that time I was unaware that Francis had a son. So, this person’s wistful wondering meant nothing to me.

Some years later I stumbled across a blog that Schaeffer the Younger wrote. I read a few of his posts and realized that I had found a kindred spirit! Frank had been deeply involved in the early Christian Right movement. He had rubbed elbows with some of the biggest names of that time. Jerry Falwell and James Dobson were among his associates. However, Frank became disillusioned with that movement as it became more and more political…and, hateful.

As I continued to follow Schaeffer online I realized that our lives had followed a very similar trajectory. We had both been deeply immersed in the conservative evangelical tribe. We both were in some form of leadership within that tribe. And, we both found that we could not toe that line. The entire facade that we had embraced turned to vapor in our hands. And, we both were faced with the task of finding a new path that we could follow in good conscience and in good faith.

I just finished reading Frank’s book, “Why I am an Atheist Who Believes in GOD: How to Give Love, Create Beauty and Find Peace.” As I’ve become familiar with Frank’s way of writing and speaking, it’s no surprise that he has titled the book this way. Frank does nothing half way. (Something he learned from his Mom.) If strong language is necessary to make his point, then “Atheist Who Believes in GOD” is a go!

As I read the book I found a sensitive and deeply reflective man. He was taught well by his parents. Both of them appreciated learning and the arts. Frank was steeped in European art and history. He learned how to give himself to others through the example of his parents’ work at l’Abri in Switzerland. In the community that Francis and Edith Schaeffer built, many people of diverse backgrounds and personalities found refuge. Frank’s parents took him to many cultural locations to share the art and history that formed Western culture. They shared the life and heritage that made living a worthwhile endeavor. This was the environment that molded and formed young Frank. And, I think, the hidden force that continues to move and sustain him today.

I share all of this not to advertise for Frank. He doesn’t need me for that. (Although, I do recommend his work.) Nor, do I want to dismiss the conservative culture, the dust of which we have both shaken off of our shoes. I simply want to point to a man who has grown and matured into someone that I think that I could be friends with. Someone who seems to be working on coming to terms with himself and God in a healthy and fruitful way.

So, I want to conclude by saying, “Hey! Jim! I found out what happened to Frankie! He’s alive and well and living a life that makes Jesus smile!”

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Wednesday Musings

This morning during my quiet time with the Ignatian Spiritual Exercises I was reflecting on Jesus before Pilate. Jesus had just been brought back after having been whipped and mocked by Roman soldiers.

Pilate seemed to have a desire to release Jesus. He exclaimed, “See, I am bringing him out to you that you may know that I find no guilt in him” (Jn 19:4).

The Leaders would have nothing of that.

“Crucify him, crucify him!” they yelled.

“Shall I crucify your King?” Pilate asked.

As I considered this, an image formed in my mind.

I saw Pilate with Jesus, beaten almost beyond recognition, standing next to him. There was a bust of trump behind him. It had a laurel wreathe on its head.

I saw the crowd, Al Mohler, Franklin Graham, Mike Pence, Tony Perkins, Robert Jeffress, and others standing there yelling, “We have no king but Caesar.”


It’s sad that American Evangelicalism can elicit such an image. Sad, but true.

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Off the Path – A Review

Off the Path: An Anthology of 21st Century Montana American Indian Writers, Vol. 1, Ed. Adrian L. Jawort, 2014, Off the Pass Press LLC, Billings, Montana.

I feel a bit strange reviewing a book full of stories written about Native Americans by Native Americans. Mostly because I’m not Native American. I’m a white male descended from the colonists who caused so much of the pain contained in these pages. However, in an interview published in Indian Country Media Network written by Heather Steinberger, the book’s editor, Adrian Jawort said that this book is important because, “it introduces Indian Country to non-Native readers who may not understand what lies right next door. ”[1] So, I purchased the book and read it so that I could get to know my ‘next door neighbors’ a little better.

This volume contains nine stories written by five different authors. Each of them brought their own particular perspective to what it means to tell stories as Native Americans. They shared the raw pain that can only be experienced by people who have been marginalized…who have had their lives ripped open…who have had their culture and history nearly destroyed.

It was a difficult read for me. I have tried to educate myself about our Original Nations and what I found is not pleasant. Our country spent almost 500 years raping, stealing land, and cheating our Native sisters and brothers at every turn so that we could make a profit from the minerals in their lands. We have brutalized these people and tried to assimilate them into OUR culture. In 1879 Richard H. Pratt opened a boarding school for the expressed purpose to, “kill the Indian and save the man.”

I don’t want this to be a history lesson. But, it’s important that we non-Natives have an idea of what has happened as a direct result of our colonial treatment of the Native people in this country.

None of the stories have to do with non-Native violence directly involved. I say ‘directly’ because I think that indirectly we are responsible for everything written. The narratives reveal deep wounds that present in Native violence on other natives. Rape, alcohol and substance abuse, and dysfunction in relationships are all prevalent. The domestic and familial violence shocked me. While I realize that these stories are fiction, I can’t help but feel that they are birthed out of true experience.

I’m not going to review every story in this anthology. I only want to touch on one to give you an idea of what they say. Shoot! If I tell you everything you won’t need to buy the book!

The first story was written by Cinnamon Spear. She is a Northern Cheyenne writer and documentary film maker. In the above mentioned interview she stated, “The greater society knows little to nothing about Natives. Having a voice is everything, otherwise people aren’t going to know the realities of our communities.” Her story is entitled “ God’s Plan.” It reveals a life that very few outside of the Native community will ever hear. A life about which we NEED to hear.

This story tells about a young woman living with a Food Channel expert mom. While the Mom works hard to keep the family supplied with food, clothing, and other essentials, the Dad doesn’t appreciate it. Apparently, Dad had aspirations of becoming an attorney and Mom did something that had shot down that pursuit. At least in his mind. For that he was angry. That anger spilled over to physical abuse. The daughter stated that, while “millions of other American children are in their pajamas carelessly enjoying the aroma of blueberry pancakes while watching Saturday morning cartoons on CBS, [she was] in East Bumfuck, Wyoming unknowingly prepared to practice real life First Responder EMS training in her living room.”

The rest of the story followed this track. The Dad was kind one minute saying, “Good morning, my girl,” to her. The next he was beating her Mom to within an inch of death.

In the end, the Dad announced that he and their Mom were getting a divorce. He proceeded to pit the children against each other by asking who would go with him and who would stay. The daughter chose to stay with Mom while her siblings chose Dad.

In the last scene the Dad says, “I said good morning, my girl. Did you sleep well? Hey! Go wake up your mom and sister, huh?”

The pain and dysfunction in this family resulted in physical and psychological abuse that went beyond extreme. We outside of the Native community do experience dysfunction and abuse. But, within Native communities these appear to be systemic. And, a result of 500 years of mistreatment by colonizers.

If there is anything about the book that disappoints, it is the editing. Or, lack of editing. I’m a grammar geek. When I read a book and come upon misspellings or parts that are not cohesive within the plot I become distracted. And, there was a lot in this book to distract. Perhaps, this was by design. Maybe the editorial staff desired that the work be ‘raw’ and ‘natural.’ I don’t know. But, for me, it was problematic.

Would I allow this to keep me from reading it? No! As I wrote earlier, these stories must be read. They must be read widely. We, as non-Natives owe it to our Native sisters and brothers to listen to their stories. We owe it to ourselves to hear their stories.

[1] https://indiancountrymedianetwork.com/culture/arts-entertainment/off-the-path-native-writers-in-montana-share-work-in-bold-new-anthology-2/, Accessed: June 20, 2017.

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Happy Imbolc!

ImbolcHappy Imbolc! This is the day that our Gaelic forebears celebrated as the turn from deepest winter to the beginning of spring. In the U.S. we celebrate this as Groundhog day. It is the mid-point between the winter solstice and the vernal equinox. New birth is coming!

Imbolc is considered a pagan holiday. So, those of us who have been a part of the Christian community either don’t know about it, or dismiss it as pagan. (It’s not worth our consideration.)

However, I think that we do creation a disservice by dismissing this. The pagan and indigenous communities seem to be more in tune with the true workings of the cosmos than those of us who claim to know better. They understand the cycles of life. And, they respect them. They celebrate them. For crying out loud! Here in the Northern Hemisphere it’s cold and bleak and gray and too freakin’ cold! What’s not to celebrate about the turning point toward warmth and new growth?

But, many of us. Especially, those of us in the Protestant persuasion consider this beneath us. It’s not in the Bible, so it can’t be good.

Protestant can look back to our birth…the reformation for much of this thinking. At that time we became “people of the book.” We tossed out the title “people of tradition” and leapt headlong into a different way of thinking.

We looked at the Biblical text and ‘voila’! We read that God had created all things and had made humans the masters! How cool! We’re the boss! We can control and exploit all of the resources that the Earth can provide FOR OUR BENEFIT!! Yea, God!

But, there is another way to look at things. Genesis 2:15 states, “Then the Lord God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it.” In the Hebrew the language is a little clearer. I mean, what does it mean to “cultivate” and “keep” it?

First, the word to cultivate can also mean ‘to serve.’ Surely, ‘till’ and ‘cultivate’ are part of the meaning. But, by far, the references are to service.

Second, the expression ‘to keep’ has as it’s primary meaning to watch and guard. Other meanings are to stand guard and protect.

For so much of our history since the reformation we have viewed the Scripture to say ‘subdue’ the world. But, is that what God has really desired?

Paul, in Romans 8, wrote that the whole of creation is groaning…waiting for the daughters and sons of God to stand up and be recognized. Even Jesus taught about an unfaithful servant who abused his fellows. In Matt. 24:42 and Luke 12:37, Jesus taught about a certain servant who, realizing that his Master was gone for a prolonged period of time, began to abuse his fellow servants. The Master of will return at a time that this wayward servant doesn’t expect and will punish him for his waywardness.

How much more will we, who have the Scripture to enlighten us, be punished for the way we have abuse the Good Creation of God?

Imbolc and the other so-called ‘pagan’ celebrations can teach us all a lot about how our world actually works. We can find life and purpose in them. That doesn’t mean that we embrace the deities and practices of pagans. But, it does mean that we listen to and respect the natural cycles of the world in which we live. The world that God loves and has redeemed.

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New Tools and New Questions

questionsI found a new tool this morning. Well, it’s not new. It’s just something that I had never paid much attention to. It’s the Voice Memo app on my iPhone. With this I can quickly note thoughts that maybe I can write about on this blog. I’m always thinking of things. But, usually when the time comes to sit and commit, the thoughts blow away like vapor in the wind.

Also, I’d like to enlist your help. What things are you concerned about that we may be able to discuss here? Maybe a pet peeve? Perhaps a thought about life and spirituality? Like my home page states, this is a “safe place for releasing hurts, disappointments and frustrations.” Or, anything else that’s important to us.

This is a small community right now. And, I moderate it pretty closely in order to keep it safe. So, please share!

Remember, tho…I’m an equal opportunity offender. I may take your ideas and twist them just a bit and toss them back to you. I do like to stir things up and make people think.

I look forward to hearing from you!

 

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Frustrated with Where This Road has Taken Me

frustratedLast week I wrote in my journal for the first time in nearly 4 months. I think that’s the longest I’ve gone in 3 years. I don’t know why I stayed away so long. I enjoy putting words to paper. It gives me a safe place to share my thoughts. Somewhere that I can vent my anger and frustration and communicate with God and my soul.

I also noticed that I have found my frustration with my job, again. For at least the last half-year I’ve experienced a lot of ambivalence toward it. I mean, I haven’t been happy doing it. But, well, I really haven’t given a shit about it, either. I get up; I go to work; I come home. In the words of the famous sage, Garfield, “Big, fat, hairy deal.”

I found myself spending way too much time imbibing in my favorite adult beverage. Yeah, the pain and frustration diminished. But, so did my health.

So, what’s different now? I’m not sure, actually. I suppose part of it has to do with the season of my life. I’m pushing 60 and, looking back, I can’t see all that much that’s been positive. Yeah, there have been moments. The birth of my kids and watching them grow into incredible people. I’ve experienced some joy, (re. a little here; a little there), making music. But, by and large my life has been one bad decision after another. Shame, anger, frustration…these have all been my closest companions. Now, sitting at the cusp of another decade on this big, blue marble dancing in space, I’m not sure that I know who I am or what I’m doing here.

Some may simply blow this off as some kind of ‘mid-life crisis.’ Maybe it is; maybe not. I’ve been in the same industry, doing roughly the same thing, for 45 years. And, it was not my first choice for a career. I entered it as a convenience since my dad was in the same industry and opened some doors for me. My true love was making music. And, while my parents bought me my first guitar, they also made it very clear that playing would only ever a be a hobby. There was simply no future in music. So, it basically became a hobby. Because, you know, you’ve got to make everyone else happy.

As I entered into high school my interest in Christian ministry was piqued. I decided to go to Malone College in Canton, Ohio to begin walking the path to the pastorate. However, a month before I was to leave, I decided to go into the workforce. I had been working all that summer, had a new car and some money in my pocket. So, why bother with college? (Another bad decision.)

So, why am I sharing this? Well, I think that I’m not alone. I think that there are a lot of folks out there that experience depression, frustration, anger and regret because their lives have been something less than they expected. As teens and young adults we had great aspirations. I had the great fortune to grow up in one of the most idealistic times in history, the 1960’s. We witnessed, and were a part of, tectonic shifts in western culture. We were going to lead the world into a new reality that encompassed equality and justice. We fought against the horrific debacle that was Viet Nam. We pulled at the scaffolding that held up the political machines that oppressed African-Americans, women and other marginalized people. The so-called ‘establishment’ was vulnerable and we went after that vulnerability.

Since then, however, I’ve watched nearly all of those who stood with me for justice and equality join in the very establishment that we worked to get past. They have embraced the same white, privileged, patriarchal way of life that has placed it’s heel on the necks of the marginalized.

So, here I am. Looking back at lost purpose, missed opportunities and many, many bad decisions. I guess that I’m not quite ready to throw in the towel. Or else, I wouldn’t be writing things like this. Things to stir up shit. Things to make complacent people think about their own place in the cultural cosmos.

What do you think? Has your life been what you once dreamed it would be? What suggestions do you have for moving forward? Or, am I a total loon that has missed the point? I’d love to hear from you in the comments.

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Is it really OK for Christians to Celebrate Halloween?

Snoopy on punkinWell, here it is All Saints’ Day. The day after All Hallows’ Eve, or Halloween. This Christianized Pagan holiday has been around for a long time. Back in the day, the Celtic folks celebrated this holiday. Only then, it was called Samhain,( pron. Sah-win). It pretty much was a time to celebrate the end of the harvest and the beginning of a new year. It is said that these people considered this a ‘liminal’ time. That is, a time when the veil between the world of spirits and fairies and our physical world was very thin. This allowed those from the other side to more easily enter our world and interact with us. This is similar to the Mexican celebration of “dia de los muertos,” or the Day of the Dead. Far from being a theme for a bad zombie movie, people celebrate by offering flowers and sugary goodies to those who have passed on. Many actually go to cemeteries so that they can be closer to their deceased relatives. It is a time to remember and celebrate their lives.

So, why do so many Christians find harm in these celebrations?

I remember when my children were young, we wouldn’t allow them to dress up and go trick-or-treating because we were taught by the fundamentalist cult we were a part of the Halloween was demonic. It was a night that Satan and his minions were honored. So, or course, as true Bible believing folk, we had to shun that lest we catch some sort of dreaded Halloween cuties. We even took them out of school on the day when their classes had their Halloween parties. You know that you can’t allow candy, cupcakes and cider to threaten your eternal soul.

We did, however, allow them to be involved in church-sanctioned alternatives. You know, Harvest Celebrations and such. They could dress up as Bible characters or some other ‘safe’ character. My son dressed up as Curious George one year. This made the sting of being some kind of weirdo a bit easier for them to take. At least, that’s what we thought. I found out years later that our separatist practice had a very negative effect on both of my children.

Since leaving that Fundagelical world behind, I’ve found a new freedom to engage with our culture rather than hide from it. The holidays and celebrations that are part of our culture allow us to be part of a larger community of people. They provide an opportunity to rub elbows with neighbors and other people we may not usually spend time with. After all, isn’t that what Jesus did?

Halloween also gives us a chance to remember and honor our ancestors. We in the West are so hung up on death and disease as horrible things that must be stamped out, that we miss the opportunities to grab hold of our mortality…our humanity. I have had some of my most spiritual experiences while walking through a cemetery. There’s nothing to fear there. But, there is much that can be gained as our imagination reaches back through time and space to meet those who went before.

So, can real Christians find truth and meaning in the celebration of a Pagan holiday? Follow this link to Samantha Field’s blog, Defeating the Dragons. I have to agree with her. And, with all of those other souls who find life while celebrating the dead.

What are your thoughts? I would love to hear from you!

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